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2:19 p.m. - 2007-10-05
I didn't jump off the wagon, I was pushed!!
Today was my Stop Smoking Completely Day Already You Loser Who Smells Like a Dirty Ashtryay.

And, uhh... I smoked one teeny tiny little cigarette at lunch. But I swear I didn't inhale. Much.

So, I got a little too freaked out and started crashing. My hands were shaking ever so slightly and my brain just felt wrapped in cotton. Unaccessible. Like I couldn't think. I thought I honestly remembered how sucky it is to quit smoking. Obviously I was wrong.

So, I slid off the wagon a little today and it's only 2:21. Luckily we're leaving right after work today for a weekend of soccer tournaments. Whoo hoo! And as luck would have it, we booked one of the last rooms available at the Motel 6. Would it be terribly rude of me to bring my own sheets? And comforter? And Lysol? Because my idea of roughing it consists of sleeping on sheets with a thread count less than 400. Eeeuw!

Everywhere else was booked the fuck up for this little soccer thang. I overheard one of the other parents talking about getting the last room at the Marriott. They. Totally. Suck. Goat. Balls.

Enough said.

My point to bringing up the soccer thing is to note that I will be with the kid and 12 other team members, their parents, and siblings all weekend long. That should make it difficult to smoke. Also spending the weekend out of my natural habitat (600 thread count, dvr, and take out, and a comfy patio chair to cheef privately) should make it even harder.

Wish me luck.

I freaking need it. And a lot more.



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