10:10 a.m. - 2007-05-11
Well, last night began the days of Ang. We kicked off the celebrations with beer and chocolate molten lava cake at Chili's. I then went home to weed the flower beds, clean up the patio, sweep and mop, and do a little laundry. (I guess I felt the need to justify my mommy-ness after all that beer and chocolate) The big finale of the evening... a sick child, crying herself to sleep. As I lay on my baby's bed with her, arms wrapped around her little body, I sang and soothed and loved. I kissed tear-stained cheeks. I stroked the hair back away from her face. With every little girl sob that reverberated through my own body, I did everything I could think of to help my honey bunches feel better. The spouse went to the all night superstore for medicine and finally, finallllly Chloe fell asleep in my arms. As I lay there listening to the blissful sounds of my daughter's sleep, I felt more like a mom than I had in a long time. I know this sounds really messed up-like those idiot women who have Munchausen's disease-but really, I'm talking about that NEED that Chloe felt for me. Dad wasn't who she wanted to hold her (although he's routinely her first pick) last night. It was me. Momma. The me who is Mom. I'm the Mother. When you see your child grow a little older, and so much more self-sufficent, sometimes it's easy to feel less needed. Not as necessary to her as I was when she couldn't wipe her own butt. Then moments like last night come along and I realize that Chloe will always want her Momma. And that's me. That's the best damned Mother's day gift I could ever have. And I haven't opened a single thing.
Have a good one.