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8:24 a.m. - 2006-09-21
Fall. Depression. Whatever.
I fucking hate html! I want a purty new look for my diary, but I'm too fucking lazy to change it up myself. Anybody out there willing to do it for me? Cheap? Something fallish or Halloweeny or ever something scary and goth. I think my new title should be "Dumping Mental Garbage on the Public Since 2003" or maybe "Ex-White Trash Suburbanite Desperately Seeking Audience to Validate Self Worth"

I'll have to keep thinking on that one.

I think it should be a service diaryland offers. For additional funds, of course. But some advanced templates at a reasonable price (maybe gold or super gold members could get a discount?) would be nice. Hear dat, Andrew??

Today is school picture day for the kid. I spent 30 minutes styling her hair this morning. First, we parted it in the middle, then braided a few skinny side pieces into a crown that wrapped around her head. Then I spent the other 20 minutes with my curling iron, some heavy duty hairspray, and a comb spinning the rest of her heavy, massively thick, silky hair into ringlets. (all of this at the kid's request, but she looked so freaking cute when I got finished!) To those of you lucky enough to be blessed, or cursed depending upon perspective, with thick hair, well... all I have to say is kudos to you if you actually face that thick shit in the mirror every morning and STYLE IT! My hair is fine, thin, and stick straight. I usually let it air dry, flat iron the ends a little, smear on some smoothing gel and I'm done.

Aaahh. The sacrifices we make for motherhood. :-)

I have been so bummed lately. So has the spousal unit. I need something to shake me out of my depression. Like sex, or chocolate, or garlic chicken pizza from the Flying Saucer. What is bothering me, I don't know, but it's coming at a really odd time of year for me. Ya see, every single year of my life, fall has been my time of rebirth. The first morning that the air has a bite to it, frost on the windshield of my car, new leather boots that smell like uh... new leather! Floral arrangements with gourds and pumpkins and dark purple mums. Shopping for Halloween decorations. Pulling out my gorgeous sweaters that, in the south, I can only wear 2 months out of the year. Then wearing that sweater, only to have to pull it off by lunchtime because I'm sweating like a whore in church.

(Oooh! Sidenote: maybe that's why I don't go to church!)

Yeah, pretty much December and January are the only REAL sweater weather months around here. But anywhoo Back to fall: The only real thing I hate about fall is raking leaves. I used to love raking them into a big pile and then setting them on fire. One) the smell of burning leaves is fucking fabulous, mmkay? and two) Fire! Fire! heh he heh he. Fire is cool.

Now that I'm a subdivision dweller, I have to rake the leaves to the curb, in a neat pile, not overlapping the street or I'll get a fine, and the city comes along in a vaccuum truck and sucks them up.


A truck vaccuum.

(really bad pun totally intended)

It is however, amusing to watch the noisy truck-vac scare the holy shit out of my cats. Good times man, good times.

So, in order to facilitate a better mood, I have, in my most imperious Capricorn style, come up with a list. Yep, that's right, a LIST OF THINGS TO MAKE ANG FUCKING QUIT BEING A WHINEY LITTLE BITCH

It goes like this:

1. Orgasmic therapy is definately first on the list, so wild monkey sex with the spouse is a must. Massaging shower head lovin just don't count in this scenario.

2. Unpack all the fake blood covered Halloween decorations and put them up. Then go buy some new ones too. (you can Never Ever have enough Halloween carnage.

3. Plant some mums in the kajillions of empty flower pots on the back patio. But first pull out all the dead plants you killed over the summer.

4. Get new pretty diary design. I'm sick of these fucking sunflowers already.

5. Go to the Flying Saucer with friends, get totally hammered on some German beer that so dark and thick you have to chew it a little, and have the garlic chicken pizza.

(that is fucking ambrosia, baby. Food of the Gods! Thin crust, fresh baked pizza covered in a pesto sauce, fresh pressed chunks of garlic, grilled chicken chunks, giant jalapenos, and mozzarella cheese. Yep, i'm totally gettin me some of that!)

6. Work out at least three times a week. Because even if I'm not getting skinny, working out makes me feel less like a fucking giant couch potato.

7. Go buy that stupid $40 Beer Garden Girl Halloween costume that you've wanted for the past three years.

8. Go buy some new, buttery soft, chocolate brown boots. With an outfit to match.

(i'm beginning to see a pattern here. Can we say 'RETAIL THERAPY' boys and girls?

Okay, 8 is enough.

I'm gonna go get coffee now.

A bien tot!



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