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3:31 p.m. - 2005-08-29
the fat bridesmaid!!
My calories so far today are:

*3 cups of coffee with fat free creamer: 30 cals per cut 90 total.

*1 Nutragrain cereal bar:140 calories.

*1 healthy choice french bread pepperoni pizza, at 3/4th of it: 300

*1 handful (large) funyons because the pizza was fucking nasty: 120 cals.

*1 caffeine free diet dr. pepper:0

*1 small apple: 50 calories.

So far today that is 700 calories! Plus I've had about 5 bottles of water (but that's normal for me, because I'm ALWAYS thirsty! And tonight for dinner we're having broiled tilapia rubbed with cajun seasoning, and a salad.

Are you getting the hint that I'm trying to drop a few pounds? This morning I weighed in at a whopping 149 pounds. I have to be a bridesmaid in a fucking wedding on October 7th and I am sooo NOT going to be the fat bridesmaid! You know how it is, and there's always one! You're stuck in a row in front of 200 people, and you all have on the exact same dresses. That means you all have an equal basis of comparison as to who has the widest ass(me), the biggest boobs (not me!) or the largest love handles (oh please god not me?!) I know everyone is supposed to be looking at the bride, but that doesn't mean I want to look like hung dog meat either!

So I'm counting calories and working out. I'm limiting my alcohol intake as well. But not too much, I want to be hot, not a cheap drunk!!

So far I haven't lost any weight except for the two pounds I lost while I had the 'flu. (I actually lost 4 pounds, but then I gained 2 back) How's that for honesty?! And 'flu weight loss counts goddamnit!

I need advice.

And medication.

Happy Monday!
Have a Buddha-ful day.



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