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3:29 p.m. - 2005-07-11
Welp, daddy's dead and he didn't leave a will. Is that properly flippant enough for you? Seriously, the funeral was Thursday. Dearest sister of mine was a pain in the ass. She quite wonderfully put the 'fun' back in funeral for me.

So there we were, simple grave-side service. Baptist minister sweating balls off in his winter weight suit. (why the fuck are ministers too cheap to buy summer weight shit when they KNOW people who want a grave-side service are always going to die in the dead of summer-pun unintentional??)

Anywhoo.. grave-side service, relatives and friends all sweating balls off as well while groovn-husband and I sit under the ugly blue tent on the ugly blue fur chair covers and wait for preacher man to get it started already, mmkay? And my sister shows up with the most cracked-out looking whore I've ever seen in my life. And a couple of cracked out friends as well. I mean, I'm not trying to deny the girl some moral support from her friends... but dude, she brought a DATE to Daddy's funeral. A date she hooked up with at the girlie bar. An ugly date too! I called her One Who Dances on a Pole and she was stoned out of her mind.

3rd cousins I haven't seen since high school, or heard from since last year's Christmas card, were pulling me aside and asking, "Who IS that with your sister?" **Gasp** Me, not feeling very patient with the uppity side of the family, just said, "Don't mind the strippers, Daddy asked for them to come."

Good ol' Daddy. Afterward, I stood in the fog of heat rolling off that many tombstones and a cloud of mosquitoes feasting on my ankles (yes, I wore capri pants to Daddy's funeral. It's JULY in ARKANSAS and they were black for Chrissakes so just back the fuck off already!) So my ankles were getting eaten up, and there I stood with the old college roommate, and several drinking buddies. It was actually pleasant to reminsce about old times with them. Several of whom I haven't seen since Mom died. It is nice to know that there are a few people on the face of this planet that actually have a couple of good things to say about good ol' Danny Mac.

I realized I must've been pretty harsh when my husband of 9 years said, "Damn, Ang, that was the first nice thing I've ever heard anyone say about your Dad."

Then I went home and had a beer in his honor. One for me, and one for my poor, dead daddy.

Rest in peace you old fucker.

Maybe I loved you after all.



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