8:20 p.m. - 2006-01-08
Well, the office Christmas party was last night. Whoo hoo. Totally belated this year as my boss was recovering from triple bypass surgery. We had to get him well enough from heart surgery to feed him wine and red meat. Keep laughing, I'm not kidding.
I've only got a few more minutes to come up with some witty reparte. Then the timer goes off on the microwave and I can go take off this fucking Crest white strips. Is is just me or do these things irritate the hell out of you? They taste like peroxide. Oh, the hell we go through for beauty. I need to be doing the whole manicure thing, but that's what early morning coffee at the office is for. Periodically my obsessive compulsive disorder refocuses itself and turns inward. Instead of scrubbing kitchen countertops and laundry room flooring, I start highlighting my hair and whitening my teeth. This is a good thing.
But here's the dilemna with that. I need to get rid of the beer belly by working out, but without stopping my alcohol intake entirely. If I stop drinking then there's no way I will be able to keep up with the 100 kajillion shots of tequila I will be given by the 5 friends who are going with us. See?!? Didn't I tell you this is a problem? Keeping up my tolerance to booze and still getting in bikini shape? Mmm. I shall have to ponder this one.
I'm thinking of switching to a vodka only diet. Grey Goose and cranberry juice. Not only will I turn that beer belly into rock hard vodka abs, but thanks to the cranberry, I will never have UTI problems, like EVER!
Well, I must go do the whole Sunday night ritual shit to get ready for work tomorrow. Ya know, ironing, picking out uniforms for the kid, sobbing quietly into my pillow, mourning the return of Monday....